Self respect comes in many forms. Keeping ourselves safe and well. Treating ourselves with kindness. Making decisions that are good for us, now and in the future.
Our environment can also reflect and enhance our level of self respect. Taking care of your space, is taking care of your self.
On a simple level self respect is all about what you think you deserve. But we are complex creatures. We are raised by people with their own standards. Sometimes we follow them, sometimes we purposely do the complete opposite.
Things happen to us, big and small, and imprint beliefs into our subconscious. Sometimes we are hurt so badly we can no longer manage our holistic wellbeing. Sometimes we feel proud of our chaos, stress and overwhelm, but secretly know it’s not good for us.
We all have different standards for living in our home that we decide are acceptable. Or we simply live in our home without thinking about it. We live with the habits and behaviours that feel natural and comfortable.
Until they don’t.
Sometimes we’re not even aware of some of them.
Until we are.
It’s as simple as making sure that you have a clean, dry towel when you need to use one. Instead of a cold and soggy pile on your bedroom floor.
I’m going to tell you something right now. You are a loving, generous, beautiful human being. You DO deserve everything that respect for self and space brings.
Your home environment.
Putting up with a space that doesn’t serve your needs. Keeping broken things. Living with people who negatively affect your wellbeing. The whole of your environment can affect your wellbeing.
Think about your whole home environment. If it doesn’t suit your needs is it possible for you to change it? You may not have a choice about where you live, but is there a way you can make it better?
Let’s say you’re going to live here for a year, or many years. How can you make your space better for your future self?
You deserve a nurturing and pleasant space to live your life in. A space that you have created to support your best life.
Your home life.
The things we do in our home create our environment. Like doing laundry regularly so you can sleep on fresh, clean linen. Not allowing clutter to build up and cause stress. Cleaning your space and quickly getting rid of rubbish to make it pleasant to spend time there.
All these things that you do in your space are for you. They’re simply you taking care of your future self, your self tonight or your self in the next half hour.
Think about the work you do in your home. “Housework” can be hard work. You might even hate it. Decluttering can be tough. You might have to do these jobs in small chunks. But they are SO worth doing. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with paying someone to do that work for you.
This work, making your space a clean, clutter-free, pleasant environment, is for YOU.
Behaviour in your home.
- Eye rolling. Scoffing. Sulking. Flouncing out of the room. Refusing to engage in discussions about sharing the tasks that make a home comfortable and healthy.
- Repeatedly NOT doing what you asked them to do.
- Refolding your linen, reorganising your dishwasher, patronising instructions on how to do simple things.
- Judgmental looks, subtle or not so subtle comments about your things.
These behaviours show a lack of respect for you and your home. You CAN set behaviour boundaries. You CAN establish expectations of the people who share your space. Even if it’s just a temporary visitor.
Allowing disrespectful behaviour reinforces that behaviour. If there are no consequences for disrespectful behaviours, they will not change. They might even get worse.
Learning to handle and change disrespectful behaviour is you, showing your self respect.
You are worth the effort.
Design your environment to make your life better. Make changes to improve your life in your environment. Do the things that make your experience of your space a truly positive one.
You absolutely deserve it.
Liz.
The Tidy Lady.
Declutter Coach & Tidyness Expert.
